It was summer 2019. I remember where I was when I wrote this. A small corner cafe in a little Finnish town called Hyvinkää. At the time these were just ideas I was playing around with. Little did I know I would be researching this much more and it would become part of my second online, educational course. If you want to know more, head to the contact page and let me know! - Sam Stacy, March 28, 2021.
Why are you doing this?
What are your goals? We may all be quick to list a number of ideal goals or outcomes. For most people, that is where the goal-making process ends. More thorough goals include SMART goals; standing for specific, measurable, achievable, relevant and time-bound. A great development in goal making, for sure, but it lacks something.
Emotion.
Almost everything we do is consciously or unconsciously motivated by emotions and heuristics. If your goals don’t speak to you emotionally, then you will be less motivated to achieve them. Start with a particular goal of yours. Now ask yourself why you want this. Ask yourself again, why. Continue this barrage of self-directed scrutiny as honestly and as in depth as possible until you arrive to one or two deeply-rooted reasons. Keep this reason hot in your grasp and remind yourself why you are doing this as often as possible, particularly before or during the hard work sets in. Reminding yourself of the deep emotions will put meaning to the work required to meet your goal.
Make hay while the sun shines
Our moods are in a constant state of ebb and flow. Sometimes we are feeling sluggish, down or fruitless. At other times we can feel motivated, energetic and productive. Make good use of the latter and put it towards something productive, such as the process of achieving your goals. Sometimes an opportunity will present itself that can provide a step in the right direction. Seize it immediately without hesitation. Your future self will thank you for it.
During periods of lower mood or energy, you can kick-start a feeling of productiveness simply by starting with the quickest and easiest task. Start with a cup of coffee for example. Remove all distractions as you prepare and enjoy the coffee to the best of your ability. Move on to the next easiest and quickest thing. It could be paying a bill online or taking out the trash. Pay attention to even the slightest feeling of satisfaction that you feel as you complete the task, however small or trivial it seems. The momentum of succeeding even in the simplest tasks will often perpetuate and intensify the successful mood and can lead on to bigger and better things. When you are feeling up, you can also use this momentum to put into place systems or make preparations for periods of less motivation or mood.
Prior preparation prevents poor performance
Systems trump willpower. Always.
Do you ever find yourself binge-eating a whole sleeve of Oreo’s then hating yourself as a result? Often this is a quick compulsion brought on by stress, low mood or hunger. You can mitigate the risk of this ever happening simply by removing all junk foods from the house. Remove all triggers of bad mood or compulsions from your reach whenever possible. Put a system in place to do the work so you don’t have to.
This can also work in the affirmative. Make preparations for good behaviours to remove the friction of getting started. For example; prepare your workout clothes, cook a week’s worth of lunches to take to work with you, or book a time at the gym with a friend or workout partner. Make it as easy as possible to start or complete the important duties in life.
Increase accountability
If you’re trying to achieve something, it helps to have someone on your side. Find someone who shares your passions or goals and organise to meet up, and work towards, or talk about your progress. Make promises and schedule meetings. The simple act of making promises and agreements means that you now have something to lose or someone to disappoint if you do not follow through with your actions.
You don’t necessarily even have to make promises or appointments. Telling some friends or people you respect of your plans will apply a little extra social pressure and a threat to your ego if you do not actuate your plans. The more layers of accountability you can work yourself into, the more motivation you will feel.
Pay for it
Investing your own money into something will give you the feeling of sunk-cost. Often a fallacy that motivates people to make irrational decisions, the sunk-cost heuristic can be put into motion to your advantage. For example, pre-paying for your movie tickets ahead of time will almost certainly prevent you from pulling out of the plans last minute. Pay for something that puts you in the right direction to your goals. This could mean hiring a personal trainer, buying the right tools or equipment needed for a job. We all want results from the things we spend our money on. Put some of your own skin in the game.
Remove your distractions
There will always be distractions and less important things to do. If you find yourself spending too much time on things that simply don’t matter, remove it from your life, or place it aside until an appropriate time. This can be video games for some, social media for others, even toxic relationships that leave you feeling in a worse mood like a type of emotional hangover. Trim the fat from your life and you will find more time to partake in the activities that you find more meaningful or productive.
Recognise and love the grind
We are confronted too often with the postcard version, or the social media, ‘highlight reel’ vision of life. We only see the outcomes or summarised pursuits of others, which we then compare to our own lives and suddenly doubt why we are even attempting what we are after. We become disillusioned with our goals simply because we forget the time and consistent effort required for anything satisfying or worth having. Realise that every dull, uncomfortable, yet necessary action towards your goal is like laying a brick. Place every brick with the mindset that it is towards something bigger. Attempt to enjoy the process mindfully and with a sense of humour, even with the mishaps that occur along the way.
Be your own best friend
When you make a mistake or suffer a detriment to your progress, pay attention to the self-talk that surrounds the situation. Do you constantly blame yourself, berate or intensify the negative attitudes? Would you speak to your best friend, or a child in the same fashion? Realise that with every journey, there are a mountain of mistakes and misfortunes that lie ahead, all unknown to you. Some will be a result of bad luck, others will be from a lack of effort or understanding on your part. This is all part of the process. It will always be much easier to recover from the inevitable falls of life if we recognise the way we speak to ourselves and make a conscious and never-ending attempt to improve the language we use in between our ears.
Move toward the light
Think of every moment as an opportunity to move towards the light or into darkness. In life we are provided with the opportunity to move towards what we want, or to give in to something that doesn’t work for us but feels easier.
We can choose to feed the part of us that makes us stronger, more honest, more capable and more resilient. We know what these things are. The more we move towards the light, the stronger we feel the pull. Strength engenders strength. Willpower begets willpower.
